Thursday, January 01, 2009
The beginning of the end
Since its 01.01.09, i shall start off with the 1st entry of the year. Looking back, i have my fair share of good company to be with. I enjoy the moments i have though things might be repetitive, i thought everything will stay the same, but never did i expect for things to change along the way.
Now i have come to a better understanding that when its time for changes, nothing you do is enough, it takes two hands to clap. I dont deny i still misses the good old days but once some things are gone, you lose them for good. Am i sad? Definitely. I gave my best as what a friend will give, you too, i believe, but things still change & i am still trying to learn this lesson. I am still nursing the hurt in me, but not to worry, this feeling comes & goes. I guessed in no time, i will be okay, i just need to meet more people & gain more experiences.
Perhaps few months down the road, when i looked back at this entry, things have become better for me.
Sometimes,its difficult to balance the things in life. Just like when you meet someone new & found out you have so much similarities in life, you tend to neglect the 'old' peeps in your life, you wanna find out more about the person & hang out more with them. Little did you know that you leave your old fren sitting there alone wondering when you will be free again to hang out for a walk or even to have a meal.
I am sure, some people will encounter the above. Most importantly, we must learn to balance. I am guilty of the above mentioned and i went through the feeling..i dont know what to say. When peeps around me asked for a gathering & i declined because i have a 'better' companion, i always feel there will always be a next time. I guessed i hurt them in a way or another but perhaps 'newer' things bring out more satisfaction. Maybe this is what you are going through i understand & i dont blame you,am just feeling a sense of loss in me.
Initially, i didnt want to think about this matter, hoping things will be better.. but i realised it only got worst when you escape from it. So i decided to face it.
Maybe God is teaching me how to love the people around me unconditionally despite the circumstances and i can tell you, its no feat. You will have 2 voices in your head. One telling you not to waste time & slowly drift away, the other telling you to just stay on & be what a friend will be, to be always around...Have you guys face such situation before? Am i too emotional for my own good?
Each day i pray for the Lord to help me not to dwell on the past (it comes & goes,very irritating) but to leave the past into his cares, im not asking him to help me to forget, but just to see things now in another light.
Today i expect myself to start off with some reading up on my lecture notes & ....dont know what else lieo. Oh yes, this sat im going for driving lesson, i really hope i can muster all my courage again to perfect my skills & not to let discouragement self-prophesize the impending failure. Haha, i must give the attitude i faced during exams for this TP so that i will not fail!
Alright, shall end here. Hope you guys have a great day ahead.
Now i have come to a better understanding that when its time for changes, nothing you do is enough, it takes two hands to clap. I dont deny i still misses the good old days but once some things are gone, you lose them for good. Am i sad? Definitely. I gave my best as what a friend will give, you too, i believe, but things still change & i am still trying to learn this lesson. I am still nursing the hurt in me, but not to worry, this feeling comes & goes. I guessed in no time, i will be okay, i just need to meet more people & gain more experiences.
Perhaps few months down the road, when i looked back at this entry, things have become better for me.
Sometimes,its difficult to balance the things in life. Just like when you meet someone new & found out you have so much similarities in life, you tend to neglect the 'old' peeps in your life, you wanna find out more about the person & hang out more with them. Little did you know that you leave your old fren sitting there alone wondering when you will be free again to hang out for a walk or even to have a meal.
I am sure, some people will encounter the above. Most importantly, we must learn to balance. I am guilty of the above mentioned and i went through the feeling..i dont know what to say. When peeps around me asked for a gathering & i declined because i have a 'better' companion, i always feel there will always be a next time. I guessed i hurt them in a way or another but perhaps 'newer' things bring out more satisfaction. Maybe this is what you are going through i understand & i dont blame you,am just feeling a sense of loss in me.
Initially, i didnt want to think about this matter, hoping things will be better.. but i realised it only got worst when you escape from it. So i decided to face it.
Maybe God is teaching me how to love the people around me unconditionally despite the circumstances and i can tell you, its no feat. You will have 2 voices in your head. One telling you not to waste time & slowly drift away, the other telling you to just stay on & be what a friend will be, to be always around...Have you guys face such situation before? Am i too emotional for my own good?
Each day i pray for the Lord to help me not to dwell on the past (it comes & goes,very irritating) but to leave the past into his cares, im not asking him to help me to forget, but just to see things now in another light.
Today i expect myself to start off with some reading up on my lecture notes & ....dont know what else lieo. Oh yes, this sat im going for driving lesson, i really hope i can muster all my courage again to perfect my skills & not to let discouragement self-prophesize the impending failure. Haha, i must give the attitude i faced during exams for this TP so that i will not fail!
Alright, shall end here. Hope you guys have a great day ahead.
# posted by ch3mysTery : 9:19 AM
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